"'Twilight's' Robert Pattinson bites Kim Kardashian."

Two of the most media friendly celebrities can’t stay out of the news lately. For Pattinson and the juggernaut that is “Twilight,” the studly vampire Edward hits websites no matter what he does. He hasn’t even hosted “Saturday Night Live” yet but people can’t get enough of it. It’s the anticipation of things, or maybe the fact that he is uber good looking.

Today, I saw an article about Kim Kardashian posing nude for “Harper’s Bazaar.” It seems that no matter what these celebs do, it’s newsworthy. Who cares to see Kardashian nude? I mean, she’s good looking and all, but the fact that every one and their dad searched the web to find her sex tape makes this picture irrelevant.

(Amanda de Cadenet/Harper's Bazaar)

That’s like Tiger Woods doing a porno. I mean, this would’ve been news a year at this time, but not now. What I think should happen, for the media sites to go crazy, is have Robert Pattinson bite Kim Kardashian – for no apparent reason.

This would be huge. I can see the headline now: “Robert Pattinson gets into character and bites socialite wastoid Kim Kardashian.” People all over the world would tweet this story, share it on Facebook, and leave random comments all over news stories that picked it up. I would love to click on to Google News and see that headline.

For now, however, I guess Kim Kardashian nude will have to do.


Jason Tanamor is the Editor of Zoiks! Online. He is also the author of the novels, "Hello Lesbian!" and "Anonymous." Email Jason at jason@zoiksonline.com.

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