"Padma Lakshmi plus Food Network equal Playboy Channel for some."

Tweet By Jason Tanamor

The fact that there is a Food Network leads me to believe that obesity in Americans is not just self-inflicted. Tune into the Food Channel and you will see every possible combination of appetizer, main course and dessert imagined. Shows such as “30 Minute Meals,” “Ten Dollar Dinners,” “The Best Thing I Ever Ate,” and “Mexican Made Easy” provide examples of why there is a ‘fat’ problem in the states.



Not only do the titles of the shows suggest some weird pornographic puns (“Mexican Made Easy”), but the hosts and actual chefs of these programs make it lights out, or should I say, dinner on, to ‘lack of will powered’ obese people. If I were overweight and I tuned into a 24-hour food channel and saw a beautiful woman showing me how to make meals, there is no way in McDonald’s hell I would ever get off my ass to work out. I would think, “Hey, that hot chick is eating this. Why do I need to work out?”

Chefs such as Claire Robinson, Rachel Ray, Aida Mollenkamp and Padma Lakshmi are all talented in their own right, but the fact that they are all beautiful women and have, at some time, appeared on the Food Network, make it difficult to not be overweight.

I guess a luxury for Americans is a problem for other countries. Sure we can give money to feed the hungry; hell we can even put out silly commercials with Sally Struthers pleading to save the children, but when the only person gaining weight is Sally Struthers, a solution has yet to be uncovered.

(Padma Lakshmi)

I would love to see the hungry fed, but the truism of food channels we have on television nowadays, doesn’t encourage these third world nations to get ambitious. These food stations have to be like the Playboy Channel for malnutrition prone people. Children are staring in amazement at some of the pictures that appear on the screen.

“Did you just see that?”

“Oh my God. That looks delicious. Wait, you were talking about the food and not Padma Lakshmi, right?”

The only difference is children aren’t scurrying in a panic to change channels when their mother enters the room. Because isn’t that where the problem starts – children? Food and a hot chick to a 12-year-old boy? That is a recipe for Jim Jones’ Kool-Aid.

What I think they should have counterprogrammed with The Food Network is the Anorexic Network. Put shows on starring Britney Spears, Nicole Richie and Calista Flockhart. They could be putting ham spread and Cheez Whiz on crackers. The shows could be called “30 Years Off Your Life,” and “Skeleton Look Made Easy.”

That way, at least you can get both ends of the stick. “Do I want to be grossly obese or toothpick thin?”

That is the question. And when the malnutrition people see this station, they could be like, “OK, we really need to eat.” Add to that, when obese people see this, they could be like, “OK, we really need to get off our ass.”

It would kill two birds with one stone.

BYLINE:

Jason Tanamor is the Editor of Zoiks! Online. He is also the author of the novels, "Hello Lesbian!" and "Anonymous." Email Jason at jason@zoiksonline.com.

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