“At least they'll have something good to drink at the Norwegian gang bang.”

By Sean Leary

Just curious: Is anyone else vaguely disturbed by that Heineken commercial?

You know the one, and you know the scene I’m talking about.

The commercial is the one where a variety of people in different walks of life, in different places, pass a bottle or several of Heineken to each other. You've got the Grizzly Adams dude passing it to the Indian woman at the Hindu wedding who passes it to the cowboy, who passes it on to the Indian guy and the Leatherman of the Village People, and on and on.

And then there's the scene that's vaguely disturbing.

You know the one.

The one with the ballerina.

For those who haven't seen the commercial, here's what happens: In this snippet, a young woman (and by young I mean, maybe twenties or so I guess), dressed in white tutu and tights, walks, carrying a silver tray with three Heineken on it, into a sauna, where several naked-ish middle aged dudes greet her with red faces, sweaty bodies and large, hearty laughs. She walks in gingerly, almost in a ritualistic fashion, and as she does, she has a Cheshire Cat smile and raises one eyebrow in a naughty fashion, all while these sauna dudes are whooping in anticipation.


Naked-ey sauna dudes. A bunch of 'em.

A little ballerina in skimpy attire, holding booze.

Am I the only one who thinks there's something kinda pervy about to go down here? Some sort of deviant Norwegian Nutcracker gang bang fantasy scenario?

Oh well, at least they'll have something good to drink after they're done.


Sean Leary's recent and current projects include the alt-rock "Spinal Tap" comedy film "Your Favorite Band" (www.yourfavoritebandthefilm.com), the award-winning short story collection "Every Number Is Lucky To Someone" (available in bookstores nationwide and on Amazon.com) and an upcoming memoir "Get That Baby A Coke: My Life As A Freak Magnet."

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Anonymous said...

You're talkin about my heini!